“She treats me like a rubbish bin, just somewhere to dump all her crap!”, he said. Things aren't going well between him and his wife. In fact, he walked out without his phone so she wouldn't be able to locate him.
Now he's sitting in a local bar and, after a few beers, shares his pain with me. He's just too nice and she doesn't appreciate all he does.
After a while we change the subject. He's a policeman and I ask him about his work. He loves his job but it's exhausting. He's often sent to deal with issues his colleagues don't want to deal with. “Work is great but I'm the one who's calm under pressure so everyone dumps their difficult cases onto me. I feel a bit like everyone's rubbish bin and I'm tired of it.”
No, in case you're wondering, this isn't about men and women, and it isn't about the work of the police.
It's about patterns. Patterns that repeat themselves where ever we are – at work, in our business, at home. It's about challenging assumptions and seeing things from a new perspective.
Patterns are a bit like typos – hard to see your own.
Spotting and breaking through patterns is my job as a coach because once you see it's not about the wife, or the colleagues, or the clients or whatever, all areas of life change for the better.
If you have a suspicion you might be running a pattern on repeat in your life and would like to explore it get in touch. I can help.
